The Potty Wagon

I have a confession to make. I drive a mini-van. Yes, I know. I used to be the person who picked on those who drove the “family wagons” and the “grocery getters.” However, I have been forced to humble myself to the fact that my sporty car days are over and a mini-van is going to be my ride of choice for the next 10 years.

I shudder every time I have to get into the darn thing. But, I must admit it is quite handy. I can fit 17 kids, 2 dogs, a weeks worth of groceries, and 2 circus clowns with absolutely no problem. However, I just can’t escape the feeling that when I drive down the road that there is a large neon sign attached to the top of the car saying “I am a mom, hear me roar!”

At least my hubby allowed me to get the upgraded van with the leather heated seats and the DVD player, so at least I can think I’m a bit sporty while I’m driving. But, the stickers stuck on the inside of the windows and the fruit snacks mashed in the carpet really don’t help much with that.

And, if it’s not bad enough that I drive a minivan, I have been driving a very dirty minivan with 2 large dents in it. (One from the darned grocery cart boy at Sam’s Club, and the other from my inability to see a large 25’ steel girder. Oopsie) I am so numb to the fact that I drive a minivan that I often don’t really look at the darn thing. I kind of hide my face and get inside as quick as possible. It is because of this that I missed the words written on the side of my van until after I had driven it around for several days.

You see, my boys are obsessed with potty humor. They think burps and farts are quite possibly the funniest things on the earth.

My middle son, Kade is especially transfixed with all things potty. He is quite a brilliant child, and as a kindergartener, he can already read at a 4th grade level. And, he can write. As evidenced by the words etched in the dirt on the side of my van.

I first noticed this as I came out of my Dr’s office, and I noticed an older gentleman standing by my car door. He shook his head, smiled, and walked away. I wondered what could wrong with my car, so I took a closer look. And that is when I saw this . . .

I was a bit mortified. But what could I do? It is really quite fitting that not only do I drive a mini-van, but a potty wagon. Perfect. The circle of life is now complete.

On a side note, Paco saw a pick-up truck drive by him this morning with the words “fart” “fart” “fart” “fart” “fart” written all over the side. It is so nice to know that we are not alone . . .